A Penny for My Thoughts
by domani guardian
Summary: Mai tells everyone what they would need to know if she died.


A Penny for My Thoughts

Mai saw today as a normal day, just sitting in the waiting room of Shibuya Psychic Research. All her friends, her adoptive family, sat around her. They watched her with a sort of odd gleam in their eyes, like they were proud of her. They'd just completed another case, and now were basking in the glory of a job well done.

Mai was, anyway. She'd had a close call with a fallen mirror and didn't quite remember how she'd managed to get out of the mess alive. But now that she was back at their office, she felt something had changed inside of her. If she had died, she had so many things she would have regretted never telling them.

So that was why she had seated them all and asked them to listen to what she was about to say.

"So after the… mirror incident, I realized how dangerous we have it," Mai started, causing everyone's expressions to twist to remorse. She didn't remember much of it, if she was being honest. There was just _so_ much blood and blinding pain and screaming that she was pretty sure she didn't want to remember it. "So if anything were ever to happen, there are things I want you all to know. I just want to make sure you hear them."

Mai felt a bit under the spotlight when they all sat up at rapt attention. Even Lin had managed his way out his office to hear what she had to say. Although Naru would never make it known to her, if she turned around, she'd see him standing at his door, listening.

"John, I guess I'll start with you," Mai said, feeling it fitting, "because you were the first one who really made me feel welcome here. You were always patient with us when we were angry at each other and would always offer anyone a smile who needed it. And you haven't changed. You're an angel, John, if you pardon the irony."

John's blush deepened further, and Mai noticed his eyes were a little teary.

"Thank you, Mai-chan."

Her gaze traveled to Yasuhara sitting next to the blonde priest. The glare on his glasses hit them just right so that she couldn't see his eyes. She started addressing him anyway, figuring he was watching her already.

"Yasuhara, your humor is the thing I love most about you. You can make any of us laugh. Even your laugh is contagious. We always need that, seeing how dark and gruesome our cases get."

Yasuhara's glasses flashed and she could see his sparkling grey eyes. He grinned that easy grin, taking away the room's heightened anxiety.

"You're too kind, Mai-chan. I only say what's on my mind. I feel like I need to offer something more than just my fabulous researching skills."

Mai giggled again, just shaking her head. That was Yasuhara in a nutshell. Behind those flashing glasses, there was a mind steadily at work to make him seem as innocent as possible. But she knew the truth.

"Takigawa-san, Ayako, you're both like my surrogate parents. I know I'm always safe around you. I'll never be alone."

Ayako's eyes welled up, and she gave Mai a watery smile.

"Oh, Mai-chan, you…" Tears spilled down Ayako's cheeks, but she brushed them away quickly with a tissue. She just shook her head, speechless.

"You'll always have us, jou-chan," Takigawa finished for her with that classic grin of his, clasping a hand over Mai's and Ayako's. Both women smiled.

"And Masako…" Mai looked around, her voice fading out. Smiles around the circle seemed to fade. "Oh. That's right. Masako isn't here, is she?"

It took a while for John to answer, "No, she couldn't be here today."

"That's all right," Mai said, smiling still. "I just wanted to tell her that I'd probably regret not being better friends with her. If we made an effort… we probably could get along really well. Like sisters, almost."

Mai felt a wave of sadness reach her throat unexpectedly, but she swallowed it back. Today wasn't a day for tears. Today was day to tell everyone how much she loved them, and how much she wouldn't be able to live without a single one of them.

"We'll make sure to tell her, Mai," John said, blue eyes meeting her brown. Mai waved him off.

"I can do it on my own." Mai looked around again, her gaze falling on Lin, standing at his office door. "Lin-san," Mai said, a calm returning to her voice. Lin bowed his head slightly, but didn't say anything, allowing her to continue.

"You've always been a protector, to all of us. We know you'll always come through. And here, at the office, you're someone to sympathize with. I don't think I would have lasted this long at SPR if it hadn't been for you. I would have gone crazy."

"Thank you, Mai-san. It's a pleasure working with you as well."

"And now all I have left is…"

"Me."

Mai jumped, not expecting Naru right behind her. She swallowed. What, exactly, could she say to him? What would she regret never telling Naru?

The words were on her lips before she could think. It wasn't like she hadn't said them to him before, and it wasn't like she was expecting a reaction from him.

"I guess I'd never know if I loved you, Naru," she said, voice clear. She paused, and then nodded, as if reaffirming her statement. Naru's expression didn't change.

"You wouldn't, would you…" he said quietly, under his breath. The brilliant blue eyes and sparkling brown eyes matched each other for a long time, before Mai turned around to address her co-workers.

"I'd really best be going, though. I promised my teachers I'd be in for the second half of the school day. I'll see everyone soon, okay?" Mai gave them all one last bright smile.

Masako slumped into John, tears immediately filling her eyes. He wrapped and arm around her shoulders as she cried. Everyone just sat listening, thinking, in silence. Ayako wiped under her eyes and rain her fingers through her hair. The priestess broke the harsh quiet.

"Do you think she knew?"

"No."

Everyone turned to Naru, gathering his coat. His eyes were dull again, but his answer firm. They hadn't lit up so much since before the accident. There were so many things he'd never know. So many things the world had taken from him.

"We'll be late for the funeral."

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><p><em>Funny when you're dead how people start listening…<em>

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><p><strong>AN: Been wanting to do a songfic for this song for a while... did you like how it turned out? Please tell me in a review :) **


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